okay, i'm medicated, and i know i'm crazy. it's no secret to me or anyone else. in discussion with david, however, i have just realized what makes my craziness more tolerable than some other people's craziness.
i am waiting to hear from someone, and i haven't. and i know that me being irritated about this person not contacting me is entirely irrational. therefore, even though each moment that passes makes me more and more and MORE irritable, i would never consider taking this irritation out on the person in question, because s/he has no idea that the simple act of not contacting me is driving me insane.
in this instance, my craziness is driving me insane, making me uber irritable and cranky, but is really having no impact whatsoever on those around me. in coming to this conclusion, i have realized there is a big difference between BEING crazy and ACTING on one's craziness. being crazy is just difficult, annoying, and frustrating for the person who suffers from the mental illness. acting on that craziness is difficult, annoying, and frustrating for all those with whom the crazy person comes into contact with.
before i was medicated, i acted on my craziness regularly and lost many friends. on medication, the craziness is still there, but i am able to tell the difference between when i should and should not allow it to affect my relationships.
YAY PROZAC!
No comments:
Post a Comment