don't be offended if your name is carl.

this is a conversation i just had with my mom. it made me giggle aloud. a lot.

lovecat713: oh god. he [my boss] just came in and i said, "good morning!" and he started cursing and said NO, it's NOT a good morning!
Shs52051: yep...now the question is, do you evacuate or NOT?
Shs52051: uh, oh
lovecat713: well, fortunately it's not my fault.
Shs52051: looks like you should have evacuated
lovecat713: he spent all morning at court on something that shouldn't have taken all morning.
Shs52051: well, you get to be our age and wasted time REALLY pisses you off
Shs52051: like me waiting around for the furniture...i STILL don't know whether it will be delivered today!!
lovecat713: i don't know what you're talking about!
Shs52051: every time i talk to carl, he's smoking a cigarette...i figure he will get cancer and die before i get this furniture
lovecat713: who is carl? and what furniture? you're nuts!
Shs52051: the bedroom furniture from buppy [my grandfather]...it was supposed to be delivered THREE WEEKS AGO!!!  and carl's the jackass in the moving company office who keeps saying that i will get calle, and they never do
lovecat713: oh my god! THAT furniture!
Shs52051: they have $456 and my furniture
lovecat713: dude, that was supposed to get delivered like the day after i left!
Shs52051: that's RIGHT!!!!!!
Shs52051: i can call that number without looking it up
lovecat713: jesus!
lovecat713: you want me to call?
lovecat713: i am EXPERT at that.
Shs52051: and dad thinks it's funny because i am so frustrated
Shs52051: man, carl has heard me say all kinds of mean things
Shs52051: and he keeps puffing away...you know how you can hear the inhale/exhale on the phone?
Shs52051: carl just has to die, that's all there is to it!
lovecat713: JESUS!
lovecat713: you are making me giggle ALOUD!
lovecat713: i am posting this gem to my JOURNAL!
Shs52051: a sacrifice MUST be made!
lovecat713: to the moving gods?
Shs52051: WELL, DAVID JUST CALLED AND SAID THAT THE FURNITURE WOULD BE HERE IN TWO HOURS
Shs52051: sorry about the caps lock
lovecat713: well, maybe david will give you better results than carl.
Shs52051: no david has been just as bad as carl
lovecat713: remember that kid named karl in sunday school in kris' class who used to put his suit jacket up over his head and run around the playground hissing?
Shs52051: although he doesn't appear to be a smoker...merely puerto rican
lovecat713: HAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!
Shs52051: yep, and don't forget dad's cousin carl...not a great expectation type of name
lovecat713: i don't really remember dad's cousin carl. that kid in sunday school, though. dude, that kid had PROBLEMS.
lovecat713: my boss' wife forgot to pack his lunch today.
Shs52051: dad's cousin carl was mildly retarded and didn't clip his nails
Shs52051: oh, more aggravation?
lovecat713: adding to the existing.
Shs52051: well, once a day goes bad, it's pretty hard to pull it back
lovecat713: he has a conference coming up on monday that i don't think he's entirely prepared for.
Shs52051: oh my god, it's like you're working for scott
lovecat713: that should actually say for which i don't think he's entirely prepared.
lovecat713: but you get the picture.
lovecat713: sometimes it is.
Shs52051: dad just called down that "we need boners [bones for the dogs]...and where's the furniture?"
lovecat713: you should run away from home. that's what i'd do.
Shs52051: i think seriously about it at least once a day
Shs52051: but minnie [one of the dogs] always talks me out of it
lovecat713: you could take her, too.
Shs52051: yeah, but she gets carsick